“I lost sight of something. I came in search of it. Having found it, I am going home.” | Ross Poldark
Much like Ross, we lose sight of things rather frequently. We forget friends, agonize over small hurts and forget large blessings, and get so caught up in the busyness of life that we forget to actually live. In our darkness and pride we forget even the Most High Himself, the One who sent His Son to save our wretched souls. Because of our finite understanding, we lose sight of the bigger picture far too often. Some of us are more prone to this than others and our weakness of mind and soul overwhelms us when the going gets tough and life is in full swing.
When we lose sight of what’s important, of what matters, we humans are capable of some pretty dark and twisted things. We slip into despair, bombarding our minds with thoughts and lies from the pit of Hell itself. Night closes in and we forget what we learned in the day-time when the Sun was blazing and everything was yellow and bright. Instead, we focus on what has gone wrong, on the plans that never materialized, on the lost opportunities, on the besetting sins we can’t seem to overcome, on the friends who slipped away, on the legitimate longings the Most High hasn’t seen fit to fulfill, on the biting remark a loved one made toward us, on the odd look sent our way by a friend, on the unanswered text messages, on the past faults dealt to us by others, whether friend or foe; and then we begin to feel worthless and alone. We fall into the sick trap of the Enemy and begin to wallow in our perceived unique-ness. We think that no one has suffered what we have suffered, no one has ever been in our place, no one can identify with our hurt and shame and guilt, no one can enter into our heart-troubles, no one cares. We revel in the darkness and welcome the despair. We wrap our misery around us like some sort of black armour and we build up our window-less walls. We refuse to let the Light in and push back any thoughts of Joy and comfort because after all, no one knows what it’s like and that’s what makes us strong.
We tread dangerous ground with pride in our deceived hearts, thinking that falls are for the weak and we sure as anything aren’t weak because we’ve clad ourselves in the Armour of Darkness. We defy the Most High when He sends us rays of glory and beauty, preferring to chew on our bitterness and re-play our hurt. We’ve lost sight of the Light and we dashed well don’t care.
When we allow ourselves to descend to such squalid depths, we open the door for the Enemy to play on our sin, to stir up the evil which lies in each of our confused hearts. We’re sitting ducks for his attacks and although we think we’re wearing armour, we’re as naked and vulnerable as the day we were born.
But thank the Most High that He doesn’t leave us in our pitiable estate! He continues to send His Word, to show us His love, and to remind us that the darkness, while fun for a moment, leads to death. Sometimes some of us need a harsh wake-up call when the tender mercies aren’t getting through. So He brings us to our knees until we go in search of what we have lost sight of: the Truth of Eternity. That there’s more to reality than what we can see and feel and even experience. That there’s blazing glory ahead if only we’ll lift our eyes from our wretchedness and leave it all behind. It’s not easy, nothing important ever is; but it’s worth it, my goodness it’s worth it. It’s worth the fight that we have to participate in as we’re searching for what we’ve lost sight of. We have to war against the despair that looks so enticing at times and remind ourselves of the Truth on a daily basis. The Most High never promised it would be easy but He promised to never leave us nor forsake us. He promised that we wouldn’t have to go it alone if we’re one of His children.
And then, having found what we’ve lost, we return home. It’s as simple as that. We learn what real strength is, what real armour is, and we continue with our lives. Wiser now, we learn to recognize the deceitful whispers of self-importance which so often masquerade as false humility and willful sadness. Recognizing them, we are better equipped to nip them in the bud and to bring every thought into captivity to the obedience of Jesus Christ. We learn the true meaning of Resurgam, in a way that Ross never did because he kept returning to the darkness even when he’d tasted the light. I shall rise again. That’s what Resurgam means. I shall rise again. Because there’s hope, my friends, there’s always hope. And with Him, we will indeed rise again.